I’m not for everyone

I’m not for everyone, and that, my dear, is my greatest asset. I won’t transform myself to match the colour of this connection.  My noise won’t be muted to suit your needs. Nor will I seek to make myself less… because you like girls with small waists and smaller opinions.  I do not exist to be something you desire.  I will not pour myself into the cracks of your own self-worth, to fill the insecurities that last girl left behind.

I’m not for everyone. I have a filthy mind and an even dirtier mouth and I won’t be censored by your disapproval.  I am unapologetically me.  It’s been my greatest act of rebellion and my hardest-fought victory that I consider myself all of the women I’ve ever wanted to be.  I am the sum of every unsavoury encounter; the product of each choice or mistake I’ve ever made. You see, what you consider to be my baggage, I know is my most valuable treasure.

I’m not for everyone. I love with a completeness that makes lesser men cower.  I love with a force you will never harness.  So don’t try. No cages, no clipped wings.  But the price of such ferocity means neither of us will come out unscathed. With me, there are no half measures.  All in or all out.

I’m not for everyone. I’m not for you. But that doesn’t mean you get to decide how ‘enough’ I am.  I refuse to give you that power. I define my own standards; I measure my own worth. Your estimation of me is as irrelevant as it is unsolicited. My life is not fair game, my body is not a democracy.  Baby, you do not get a say.  The only opinion of me that matters, is my own.

I’m not for everyone.  But for one, I am everything.

 – k.w

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