I know you not, but I know
You are kind and brilliant and generous.
I know this
For he could adore nothing less.
He adored me.
The past tense of that verb leaves a sadness within me.
My love for him stands overlooked and disused,
Like the derelict rail arches on Fairfield Street.
My fingers and my lips
Ache with the memory of him
Memories that are now yours to make.
He will make you laugh;
Laugh with him.
Don’t let him make you the Ernie to his Eric.
Who wants to be the straight man?
He needs you to be the adoring audience
Not part of his double act.
Know that his words will never be weapons; he is far too kind.
And remember it,
When clumsy expressions sometimes spill from his mouth.
Never question his intent,
He is incapable of causing you pain.
With only love; with an open heart,
Without judgment or cynicism,
Not tainted and distorted by the ugly noise from your past.
Really hear him,
Even when he does not speak.
Talk with honesty, with purpose, with beauty.
Give him the freedom to speak his truth,
Free from fear of reprisal or Sundays spent sulking.
His words are beautiful
They will lay you bare, undress your soul,
Hold a mirror to your pain and then kiss you better.
His selflessness is rare,
Always recognise this.
He is your safety net, your bubble-wrap, your cheerleader,
With him, you can become the greatest version of yourself,
But wrap him tight too,
Even if you think he doesn’t need it; he does.
Know him; really take the time to know him
And don’t let him hide in dark corners,
Or lose himself battling your demons.
Don’t take his confident expressions
To mean that he is strong enough to carry both of you
He is fragile and precious.
Keep that blaze of colour; don’t let it fade out in the wash;
Vanilla is not a shade he wears well.
Enquire, explore, consider
Be in the moment.
Follow not my ways
And you may endeavor to deserve him.
Make him happy
In the way that I fell short,
To be his world is to be home.
Love, to that end, is beyond comprehension.
If you can be what he deserves, I could not have lost him to a better woman.